Bismillah.

*warning* panjang, gak baku, tulisan versi curhat dan cerita santai.. 

Prolog 

Jadi ceritanya, salah satu teman indonesia yang aku temui dari aplikasi bottled ngajakin untuk baca buku Mukaddimah-nya Ibnu Khaldun. Beliau dateng ke book club di Bandung yang bahas buku tersebut, biasanya baca buku versi arab dan versi inggris kalau gak salah. Nah beliau sendiri, punya buku Muqaddimah tapi versi lama gitu, aku bahkan lupa penerbitnya apa, tapi dari fotonya kaya buku jadul gitu.

Nah karena beliau ngajakin baca bareng-bareng, sama satu lagi temen dari bangladesh, oh ya ini kita bertiga sama-sama muslimah. Kita buat nama samaran deh, biar enak ceritainnya hehe.

Ukhti Bandung: Anggrek

Ukhti Bangladesh: Lily

Jadi karena yang ngajakin Anggrek, beliau sharing gdrive yang isinya beberapa pdf buku Muqaddimah versi indonesia, inggris, dan ada juga buku-buku terkait Ibnu Khaldun. Nah Lily udah beli bukunya yang versi terjemah inggris, tapi Lily tuh miss gitu. Sempet gak baca penjelasan Anggrek yang cerita kalau versi bahasa inggris itu diterjemahin sama orang yahudi.

Nah, aku.. karena gak terlalu familiar sama buku Mukaddimah atau Ibnu Khaldun, iseng baca biografi Ibnu Khaldun yang buat anak-anak gitu. Dari buku kecil itu, aku lumayan belajar fakta-fakta baru. *ketahuan banget ya aku dari dulu sekolah negri dan gak paham sama nama besar Ibnu Khaldun, yang kalau di buku biografi tersebut dikasih julukan sebagai Bapak Sosiologi Islam.

Kutipan dari Sesi Baca Awal

25 Agustus aku baca halaman 9-16 dan mencatat beberapa kutipan ini,

"Secara hakikat, sejarah mengandung pemikiran, penelitian, dan alasan-alasan detil tentang perwujudan masyarakat dan dasar-dasarnya, sekaligus ilmu yang mendalam tentang karakter berbagai peristiwa. Karena itu, sejarah adalah ilmu yang orisinil tentang hikmah dan layak untuk dihitung sebagai bagian dari ilmu-ilmu yang mengandung kebijaksanaan atau filsafat."

...

"Kebodohan telah menjadi wabah sekaligus bencana kemanusiaan." 

... 

"Sesungguhnya bekal setiap ahli ilmu sedikit. Kemauan untuk mengakui kekurangan dan kritikan adalah keselamatan. Sedang kebaikan dari teman-teman adalah sesuatu yang diharapkan. Hanya kepada Allah aku meminta agar menjadikan amal-amal kami murni untuk-Nya. Cukuplah Dia bagiku dan Dialah sebaik-baik penolong." - Ibnu Khaldun

.... 

Oh ya, aku baca buku Mukaddimah - Ibnu Khaldun yang diterbitkan Pustaka Al Kautsar. Yang buat aku penasaran adalah bagaimana versi bahasa inggris dari buku tersebut, karena seperti kebanyakan buku para Ulama atau p enulis islam, akan ada doa, yang diselipkan. Seperti ini,

"Hanya kepada Allah aku meminta agar menjadikan amal-amal kami murni untuk-Nya. Cukuplah Dia bagiku dan Dialah sebaik-baik penolong." 

Ini aja baca terjemah indonesianya, feelnya beda banget, sama kalau kita tahu/baca bahasa arabnya. I wonder will these sentenced be erased? Sebenarnya aku bisa cari tahu sendiri sih, coba cek. Tapi aku gak ada waktu buat baca yang versi bahasa inggris juga. Hehe

Snippet Chat Diskusi di Bottled 

Oh ya, aku udah cerita kan ya, aku ketemu sama Anggrek dan Lily di Bottled awalnya dari public island (grup umum) muslimah all over the world. Trus Lily, ngajakin masuk ke private island (grup privat) dia untuk diskusi buku. Dia dengan baik hati ngirim aku parrot (cara biar bisa chat/dm ke akun bottled). Trus dari situ, baru dia kirim link biar aku bisa masuk ke private islandnya. Waktu itu aku masih pengguna pemula di bottled, gak punya koin apalagi parrot. 

Sebenarnya ada banyak hal yang ingin aku copy paste dari aplikasi bottled, hasil diskusi kami. Tapi karena qadarullah hpku agak bermasalah, bahkan sempat ngira bakal lost contact gitu ke Anggrek dan Lily. Jadi berikut ini, sedikit dari percakapan kami terkait sesi baca buku Mukaddimah Ibnu Khaldun.

Ini berawal dari share Anggrek setelah baca buku biografi Ibnu Khaldun. Sebelumnya, kita pernah sedikit bahas bahwa ada banyak pihak yang mengkritisi Ibnu Khaldun. Diskusinya dalam bahasa inggris ya, gak akan aku terjemahkan.

Anggrek:

Anggrek:

Aliran Rasa Sesi Baca Kedua pakai Bahasa Inggris  

Penutup

Bismillah.

*Disclaimer* Mohon maaf karena blog ini akan sering diisi tulisan bahasa inggris. Dan itu pun bahasa inggris yang belum diedit, kalau bahannya dari buku/hasil googling, biasanya aman sih. Anyway, gapapa nginggris ya, yang penting blognya keisi hehe 

***

#CuriousMe

This is a curious question.

Why do you think wolf is chosen by people to represent something bad?

I mean, there are other predators too. Lion, why is chosen as the king of jungle. Just because he has crown like mane, and have many women around him? Lol

And there's tiger, but tiger usually also used to represent bravery. 

***

But then when I googled, actually wolf doesn't symbolize something bad.

Wolves symbolize loyalty, freedom, and the untamed power of nature across many global cultures and spiritual traditions.

*Core Symbolism*

1. Loyalty and Family:

Wolf packs display deep social bonds, strong family ties, and cooperative hunting, representing devotion to loved ones.

2. Freedom and Wilderness:

They embody the wild, free spirit of nature and survival in harsh environments.

3. Instinct and Intuition:

As a spirit animal, the wolf encourages trusting your gut feelings, sharpening awareness, and listening to inner wisdom.

4. Intelligence and Strategy:

Their ability to adapt and communicate makes them symbols of sharp intelligence and leadership.

***

So why people use wolf as negative character?

The answer is in the screenshot picture I attached.

It's a learning process too, to have questions and look for the answer. Asking others is good, it's a way of communicating. So I guess it's better to take turn, sometimes asking others, and most of the time, looking for the answer by yourself.

Wallahu'alam.

Bismillah.

Another Nukil Buku | "Master Your Dopamine" - Nick Trenton

***

43/143

I'm back after reading 6 more pages into the book.

Still reading about stimulus control.

I learn from the book how physical activity can help us fix abnormal dopamine system on brain. I'll just give you the quotes cause it's a long but important to note.

"Physical activity also authorizes the release of dopamine and helps revamp and remodel the reward system over time, resulting in increased circulating amount of dopamine and more accessible dopamine receptors.

Exercise can do both—alleviate depression and increase your capacity for joy. These adjustment can also help to repair the brain damage caused by substance abuse.

Substance addiction affects dopamine levels in the brain and the availability of dopamine receptors in the reward system. As a result, addicts may feel unmotivated, sad, antisocial, and unable to appreciate regular joys. Exercise can help to reverse this."

***

It is also said that news actually function similarly to slot machines, providing them with a new burst of dopamine each time they "pull to refresh".

It make me realize that in this era where we're flooded with many news and information, it's important to make limit for us. Control the stimulus as it told before.

***

The author then write about the dopamine fasting schedule.

For examples setting aside one to four hours at the end of the day to completely abstain from all addictive behaviours. No electronic, no reading books or magazine, no sex or masturbation, no good, no talking, no music of podcast, no coffee or other simultants.

Activity that is allow at that time is: writing (with pen and paper), meditating, going for walks, doing some deep thinking, inner child-work, visualizing, and replenishing with water.

He also suggest if individual can devote one weekend day (spent outdoors on a Saturday or Sunday), on weekend per quarter (go on a trip), or one week per year (go on vacation!)

He also said, if we can't have that kind of schedule, it's okay to have a small but consistent fasting schedule even if only one hour per day

***

As I read those above, there's some question I have.

1. Like how reading a book is something that we should avoid while doing detox fasting. I mean.. we really need more time to read in this era while we're so used to read caption, comment and threads, or devouring so much information from watching endless short form videos.

2. What's inner child-work? 

3. What's replenishing with water? Is it drinking a lot of water? Or playing in water like swimming or just having "ciblon" session wkwkwk.

Number one question is answered some pages later, where the author write that we could make reading as list of activities we can still engage while having dopamine fasting.

Number 2 and 3 is my homework, I don't know should I googled it or ask Meta AI about it. Before, I see AI with neutral eyes. But seeing how bad AI treat book and affect bad on environment, I'm now seeing AI in negatives view. So I minimize the usage as I could.

But just like all the things that human made in this earth, it's all mata' (just tools). And it could be used for good or bad. So, should be wiser and used it for good things. And I should use my brain often rather than depending on AI.

***

I think that's all for today's Nukil Buku. See you later when I finished another session of reading this book.

Wallahu'alam bishowab.

***

PS:

[1] The answer of my homework:

a) Inner child work is a therapeutic process of connecting with, understanding, and healing the younger, subconscious part of your psyche that still holds the emotions, memories, and beliefs from your childhood.

b) Replenishing with water means restoring fluids lost through daily activities, heat, illness, or exercise to keep the body properly hydrated.

Ways to replenish water: 

💧 Plain water: The best and easiest choice for daily hydration and mild fluid loss.

🥤 Electrolyte drinks: Sports drinks or oral rehydration solutions replace lost salts and minerals after intense workouts, heavy sweating, or illness.

🍉 Water-rich foods: Fruits and vegetables like cucumbers, watermelon, strawberries, and celery contribute about 20% of your daily fluid intake.

🥛 Other beverages: Milk, herbal teas, and broths also help restore your fluid balance

[2] Ciblon is a region words from Purwokerto to call activity having part of our body submerged in water without actually swimming. Just playing in the water.

[3] I actually have read the PDF till page 59. This is the last note I write on my phone.

I don't know whether I'll take notes from page 43-58 first, or I'll continue reading and makes this kind of resume in the end of chapter 3. Let's just see...

Bismillah.

A long things I want to write in my HelloTalk's moment, but got cut a lot because of the 2000character limit.

Let me just post here.

As usual, disclaimer, there will be a lot of broken grammar and poor vocabulary. I welcome any correction in comment.

***

*500 Messages in 12 Days*

Her nickname is written in Chinese, but She's Algerian.

As a person who rarely chat often. This is surely an achievement.

Months ago, instead of just using English/Korean in my head, I install some international social media that can help me practice more those 2 languages. I install Slowly, Bottled and Hello Talk.

🐌 Slowly

Slowly is nice in the beginning. I really enjoy improving my language there through reading and writing letter.

The problem next is.. my overthinking habit often makes me think more before writing a letter. And it exhausted me. To write and revise not only once sometimes twice in my head, before writing it later. It disappoint me also, as people mostly only reply letter without even giving any question as the feedback. It makes me feel as if I'm interviewing someone. Lol. As a curious person, I do like to ask a lot. But there's a limit to it.

At first I like slowly because of the pacing, but later, I found out it didn't match my overthinking personality. So now, I still use slowly, not actively exchanging letter, but just reading open letter, to get to know many people without even interacting with them. It's a good place to learn language too, if somehow an Arabic/Japanese/Korean letter come up in my Open Letter board.

🧴 Bottled

It kinda mix random letter sending + uploading 24h limited story (it's called diary there).

There's a whole lot new things I learn when I first joining that app. A lot of disappointment in the first place, cause most people using that app for dating app >< while I'm not there for that at all.

But I like how the app is noise free. And thankfully in a very few people I met (whether through throwing/keeping bottle/joining public island), I found friends who like to read and discuss book. So now I mostly go to there to read our private book island, or chat with a few people I am comfortable to randomly ask for a topic I want to discuss.

👋💬 Hello Talk

Finally talking about what the title is about lol. What a long prolog.

Anyway, I join firstly because I want to improve my Korean language skill. Cause in Bottled there's almost no one speaking Korean. Or may be yes, but I just didn't meet any of them.

But as I use this app, I mostly speak and learn English. I still listening and read to korean book. But a almost never practice speaking Korean here.

Anyway, my chat in HT is almost unused. I found that joining or hosting VR as a place to learn more. Connecting with people in chat is not easy. I don't know which user is active and willingly to learn together. Not, until I found this Algerian Girl on an English group that I already removed from.

Thanks to her willingness to stay connected and practice English by either chating or sending voice note. This 500 messages is the proof. I remember I disappoint her once, and it almost makes her don't want to chat with me again. It's a lesson for me not to promise joining someone VR if I'm not sure whether the timing is match or not. The guilt is something I personally should work on.

Anyway that's the story. Thanks HT for this reminder. It's a good app that knows how to make each user experience to stay connected and active in this app. The birthday reminder, the thank you button if someone else sending gift/likes to us, and this... a 500 messages milestone.

What about you? Tell me about 500 messages milestone, with whom you got it, and if you haven't got it yet, what kind of person/topic that maybe can makes you continuously send messages to/about?

 Bismillah.

Sudah lama aku tidak membaca buku ini, buku tentang Quran yang ada di rak buku putih yang cuma kutemui sepekan sekali. Aku terlalu terbiasa membaca buku-buku digital, sehingga aku seringkali lupa nikmatnya membaca buku fisik. The beauty of turning the page, and the easyness to read from paper instead of screen. Semoga Allah menjaga mataku agar bisa lebih banyak membaca buku, dan melihat indahnya alam. Aamiin.

***

Aku membaca 2,5 lembar*. Cuma 2,5 lembar, tapi dari yang sedikit itu, hatiku tergerak untuk membagikannya ke sini.

Saihul Basyir menuliskan tentang pengelompokkan surat. Tentang hadits Rasulullah bersabda bahwa di dalam Al Quran ada surat-surat pengganti Taurat, Zabur dan Injil. Lalu sang penulis menuliskan tentang Al-Quran berdasarkan waktu dan kondisi diturunkan, baik itu di bumi, langit, atau di antara keduanya, saat safar, pada siang atau malam hari, juga pada musim dingin atau musim panas.

Lalu beliau menuliskan salah satu hikmah mengapa Al Quran turun di berbagai waktu, tempat dan situasi. 

Lalu ia bicara tentang cinta. Dan bahwa Manusia, bisa mencinta tanpa bertemu atau melihat yang dicintainya. Mengapa? Karena kita melihat bukti nyata bahwa meski mata tak pernah melihat, cinta-Nya sampai pada kita dan bisa kita rasakan sampai saat ini. Pun cinta Rasulullah pada kita. How can we not love Allah and His Messenger? Kalau pun kita belum cinta, itu hanya karena kita masih buta dan belum mengenalNya dan rasul-Nya.

***

Aku juga suka bagaimana penulis mengakhiri sub-judul tersebut,

 

Itulah cara Allah subhanahu wata'ala menuntut hamba-hamba-Nya yang mendapat hidayah. Manusia dapat mencintai sesuatu yang tidak pernah mereka temui dan lihat, dengan sebenar cinta. Karena mereka merasakan bagaimana Allah azza wa jalla dan Rasul-Nya mencintai mereka dengan sebenar-benar cinta lewat Al-Qur'an yang diturunkan dan hadits yang disebarkannya.

Maka balaslah cinta Allah subhanahu wata'ala dan Rasulullah shalallahu 'alaihi wassallam pada kita dengan sebenar-benar cinta. Buktikan lewat Al-Qur'an sebagai kunci utamanya dan hadis sebagai pena penjelasnya. Agar bukti cinta kita pada mereka menjadi nyata. Tidak sekedar cinta buta yang diaku, padahal hanya pepesan kosong belaka. Juga bukan sekedar cinta membara yang disolek, padahal ia hanya ungkapan ringan yang dasarnya pun terlihat karena teramat cetek.

#daribuku Kun Bil Qur'ani Najman - Saihul Basyir, PT Elex Media Komputindo

Semoga cinta kita pada Allah dan Rasul-Nya tidak sekedar cinta buta yang diaku, atau cinta membara yang dioslek. Mari belajar mencintai Allah dan Rasul-Nya lewat aksi-aksi kecil yang nyata.

Karena seperti kata beberapa penulis (Salim A. Fillah, Anis Matta, dll), cinta itu bukan kata benda. Cinta adalah kata kerja. Jadi saat kita bicara tentang cinta. Cinta tersebut memanggil kita untuk melakukan kerja-kerja dan usaha-usaha. Jadi cinta bukan sekedar sesuatu yang manis diucap lidah dan ditulis tangan penyair. Cinta, lebih dari sekedar itu. 

Wallahua'lam bishowab. 

*** 

Keterangan:

*lembar ya.. bukan halaman. Dalam bahasa indonesia, ini jelas pembeda, kalau kita baca buku digital, fokus kita ke jumlah halaman. Tapi gatau kalau dalam bahasa inggris. It's not natural to say I have read some sheet >.< it sounds awful, but google translate say that lembar means sheet. I think english people speaker just use pages whether they speak about physical book or digital book.

Bismillah.

Nukil Buku "Master Your Dopamine" - Nick Trenton, www.NickTrenton.com

***

Aliran rasa setelah baca 6 halaman lanjutan dari buku tersebut. Nukil bukunya dalam bahasa inggris, mohon maaf kalau ada typo dan grammar. Feel free to correct me in comment.

***

Prolog

*you can skip this part*

37/143

I am wondering whether I should still share my reading progress to the friend whom I got the PDF from. He seems busy and his messages might be filled with many chats. He hasn't read my last chat, and the previous chat too he only seen it (probably not read it, or read but forget to reply).

My reading progress is so slow, compare to reading novel. And it might be that he doesn't relate to my rambling or felt the need to reply since it's not the book he read currently, and my rambling is mostly like a resume of what I read.

He actually suggest me to join the reading club group he made in Discord. But I personally don't want to do it, cause I don't have discord in the first place, and if I install discord, it means I add another new social media. I already distracted so much, and add 2 new social media (thread and substack —i know it's blog/writing social media but still).

Anyway, let's just write what I got so far from reading 5 more pages from the previous reading session.

***

6 pages I learn a little about Stimulus Control.

Stimulus Control

Stimulus control refers to instance in which a behavior is elicited by the presence of absence of stimulus.

Stimulus control has the ability to either encourage or inhibit behavior.

Based on what Schultz write in 1993, the author take conclusion that by controlling the stimuli of food or money, individuals can successfully regulate their dopamine levels.

So when we do stimulus control, we basically try to eliminate opportunities for negative behaviors by removing harmful stimuli from surrounding environment.

This control of harmful stimuli is going to cause their dopamine levels to increase naturally, as the brain craves change. And it shifts from immediate gratification to long term gratification which will make us having a better satisfaction and resourcefulness long term.

Example of Stimulus Control

Example of stimulus control, for someone who distracted often by their cell phone, the control is either put the phone away and make it harder to access, or built a timer or alarm so we limit our interactions with cellphone.

Do you know IG has that facility to make alarm/limit your scrolling? Have you activate that? *I haven't. And maybe that's why I often find myself guilty after wasting time scrolling reels ><

There's also many productivity app like Forest, that helps us to focus on doing other activity with certain amount of time, while activating that app.

Baca juga: Instagram, Forest, dan lainnya

And you know what? Opening a VR in hellotalk somehow can make me more focus on reading, and help me read longer than I usually read. Like this session, I only read 6 pages. But if I read in VR mostly Indonesian book, I can read 30 minutes. I usually still break it into 15 minutes per book. I usually schedule to read 1-3 books in hello talk VR. But the minus from doing that is.. it is actually slower to read in VR, cause I read aloud, of course reading without sound is faster. And my throat is getting dry often. That's why I don't do VR reading often cause my energy is limited, I only do when I am on my extrovert side.

Silent reading, few pages, while taking notes and write resume like this is more familiar for me. But doing VR is also good when I feel like I don't have any focus and want to finish reading after 3 pages while doing silent reading. Let's just do any variation to make the habit of reading stay. Ah, and my WhatsApp reading support system for girls is still there, if anyone want to join, you can reach out to me in my social media, just search Isabella Kirei id, that is me in most of my social media. (I do have other nickname for hellotalk,slowly,bottled,and substack) but other social media x,IG,thread,medium,Tumblr,telegram my id is Isabella Kirei.

***

Back to the book, I closed this writing with quote from the book.

The Stress of Multi-task and How to Release It 

Multi-tasking and trying to do too many things all at once can be highly stressful. For those feeling stressed, if might be valuable to engage in an alternative activity that is incompatible with whatever is causing the stress (the stimulus); this could mean doing something physical instead of sitting in front of a screen all day, or going outdoors for some fresh air and sunshine instead of worrying about satisfying that "urge to indulge".

Itches that Shouldn't be Scratches

There are some itches that shouldn't be scratched. Think of an urge as an "itch". If it is constantly scratches, it might get infected.

The dopamine system works in a similar fashion. Continuously satisfying an urge is going to make it come back stronger than ever, and it's going to require an individual to scratch a lot harder.

If someone is addicted to the dopamine high that accompanies a good meal and is always ready to indulge in a little emotional eating, it would be beneficial to go and play badminton instead as soon as the urge surfaces.

This is the backbone of a dopamine fast—replace all harmful behaviour with healthy ones and do not give in to the urge.

***

Oh ya, kalau kamu gimana, punya trik atau tips untuk stimulus control kah?

Sekian nukil buku kali ini. Sedikit, tapi semoga bermanfaat.

Wallahu'alam.

Bismillah.

#SelfDiscovery 

Saat membaca pertanyaan ini di list sisa-sisa challenge nulis self discovery (7 more to go including this one), yang pertama muncul di kepalaku adalah Bandung dan Purwokerto. Beberapa waktu belakangan ini aku merindukan kota itu hehe. Dan aku juga menyukai tempatku tinggal saat ini, Purwokerto. Tapi karena harus menyebutkan tiga, dan aku tidak punya jawaban kota ketiga.. akhirnya aku jadi harus putar otak untuk memikirkan jawaban lain.

Tadinya, aku ingin menyebutkan nama-nama tempat spesifik yang belakangan ini jadi tempatku healing hehe. Tapi sepertinya lebih baik menyebutkan secara umum aja ya hehe.

1. Taman/Nature Spot

Tempat favorit pertama adalah taman/nature spot. Taman yang sejuk, ada pohon rindang, bisa buat jalan kaki dan olahraga, bisa buat baca buku, bisa buat sante sambil main ayunan. Bagus lagi kalau ada tempat buat jajan juga hehe.

Kenanganku akan taman sebagai tempat healing awalnya dari Bandung. Inget banget pas mulai sering jalan kaki random ke taman-taman di Bandung. Ada yang udah bagus dan terawat, ada yang.. ya seadanya. Tapi taman selalu jadi tempat aman untuk me-time, gak terlalu sepi, karena seringkali ada anak-anak kecil dan orangtuanya.

Kalau mau upgrade lagi, sebenarnya, kalau bisa pergi lebih jauh daripada ke taman, aku sangat suka berkunjung ke nature spot, maaf kalau jadi campur bahasa inggris ya, soalnya aku gak tahu istilah yang pas dalam bahasa indonesia. Intinya pergi ke alam itu jadi nomer 1 favorit. Entah hiking di hutan, berkunjung ke curug, ke pantai, melihat sawah/kebun, sungai, pokoknya alam.

It hurt me so much reading bad news.. how kalimantan's forest is in fire TT. It reminds me so much about an ayah, 

ظَهَرَ ٱلْفَسَادُ فِى ٱلْبَرِّ وَٱلْبَحْرِ بِمَا كَسَبَتْ أَيْدِى ٱلنَّاسِ لِيُذِيقَهُم بَعْضَ ٱلَّذِى عَمِلُوا۟ لَعَلَّهُمْ يَرْجِعُونَ

Telah nampak kerusakan di darat dan di laut disebabkan karena perbuatan tangan manusia,

supaya Allah merasakan kepada mereka sebahagian dari (akibat) perbuatan mereka,

agar mereka kembali (ke jalan yang benar). [Surat Ar-Rum (30) ayat 41] 

Pray for Indonesia, pray for the nature, pray so we don't belong to people who make fasad on the earth and the sea. Ya Allah let us become someone who come back to the right path, if we slipped and fall into doing wrong things...

2. Perpustakaan

Tempat favorit kedua setelah taman/nature spot adalah perpustakaan. Tempat dimana aku bisa cuci mata dengan banyak buku, meski untuk baca, butuh fokus dan usaha lebih. It's a quiet place where I could read, write, and process my thought. Memoriku akan perpustakaan adalah masa-masa sekolah. Perpustakaan SMP 2, kecil tapi penuh buku-buku yang menjadikan aku seperti sekarang. Kebiasaan ke perpus ini, yang membuatku masih bertahan membaca, meski kemampuan fokusku sudah jauh berkurang, semangat bacaku juga naik turun, persentase kemungkinan aku selesai baca sebuah buku juga makin menurun. Aku juga kangen perpus-perpus di Bandung. Such a cozy and luxury library there, compare to what exist in here. Tapi perpustakaan meski kecil, dan mungkin tidak punya arsitektur yang wah, tetap saja jadi tempat favoritku. Tempatku untuk tumbuh dan belajar ulang akan hal-hal yang mungkin aku lupakan di luar perpustakaan.

Buku, selalu jadi teman terbaik. Saat semua orang rasanya tidak ada yang mengerti. Ada saja buku yang saat membacanya membuatku merasa dimengerti. Buku mengajarkan banyak hal tanpa menggurui. Huruf dan kalimat di dalamnya tak bernada, membuatku lebih nyaman membaca, meski seringkali sadar bahwa ia "menyerang"ku dan memintaku lebih dari sekedar membaca. Buku setia menanti, meski aku seringkali lebih suka menghabiskan waktu dengan distraksi. Lewat buku, perspektifku terbuka lebar. Aku bisa "mengobrol" dan mengetahui buah pikiran dari banyak penulis. Buku juga jadi pengisi tekoku, agar aku tidak menulis kata-kata kosong dan lebih banyak sambat atau curhat nirfaidah hehe. Tapi gapapa juga kok nulis aliran rasa tanpa perlu memusingkan manfaat, karena kadang, tujuan kita menulis adalah untuk diri kita. Penting, terutama untuk perempuan "pendiam", mengalirkan tiap rasa dan pikiran yang terbendung karena lisan kita terbiasa untuk menahan semuanya kecuali pada orang dan momen tertentu. 

3. Masjid  

Jujur menulis yang ketiga ini, rasanya rindu. Rindu sekali. I wish I could find somewhere, and be like grandma or mother who frequently visit masjid at least 3 times a day. Aku rindu masa-masa di Bandung, apalagi saat dapat nikmat 2 tahun tinggal dekat masjid Salman. Duduk dan berdiam lama di masjid adalah momen-momen berharga. Bahkan jika bukan waktu shalat, dan gak lagi kajian, waktu-waktu di masjid terasa jauh lebih berkah. Kadang bahkan observasi dan memerhatikan sekitar saja bisa jadi bentuk pengingat dan charge iman. I love being in crowded mosque and being alone at the same time. Apalagi kalau masjidnya hidup, masjid yang tidak hanya hidup saat waktu shalat. I miss Masjid Salman so much, each of the koridor, menaiki tangga dan duduk balkon kayu atas akhwat, meski cuma di luar pintu. SRC. Selasar teh. Lapangan rumputnya. Asrama Putri. Rooftop.

Di Purwokerto alhamdulillah banyak masjid yang enak juga buat berdiam diri. Meski hanya sesekali dan tidak bisa sesering dulu. Masjid selalu jadi tempat aman dan nyaman kalau lagi ingin sendiri dan mencerna perasaan yang campur aduk. Dan Allah seringkali mempertemukanku dengan orang-orang baik di masjid. Meski bahkan cuma satu pertemuan singkat, tapi cukup untuk mengajarkanku beberapa pelajaran penting.

***

That's all my 3 favorites places to go. What about you? 

***

Keterangan :

Tulisan ini termasuk rangkaian 30 tulisan mengenal diri.

Baca juga:

Bismillah.

 Mencoba memaknai kemerdekaan dari kutipan buku Your Journey to The Ultimat3 U - Rene Suhardono.

***

"Pak Maladi (penulis lagu "Nyiur Hijau") berujar bahwa berkah kemerdekaan terbesar adalah tercapainya kebebasan berpikir, bertindak dan berkarya untuk setiap insan Indonesia.

.

.

Liberty begins from the heart. Your heart. My heart. Our hearts.

.

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We live in a free country, but do we have free minds?

.

.

Kemerdekaan (bangsa) cuma sekedar pintu gerbang dan bukan tujuan akhir. Apa artinya merdeka jika masih merasa terbelenggu dalam hidup. Apa gunanya kebebasan jika terus merasa tidak berdaya?

.

.

Indonesia sudah merdeka. Ini fakta. Pertanyaannya: Apakah Anda, saya, dan kita sudah memaknainya dan berpikir selayaknya orang merdeka? Bertindak sebagaimana orang berdaya? Dan, berkarya selayaknya orang peduli?

.

. 

Pemikiran, tindakan, dan karya adalah indikasi orang merdeka.

.

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The first step to freedom is realizing that you are enslaved. 

***

Kalimat terakhir adalah pengingat, bahwa satu-satunya cara untuk merdeka, adalah menyadari saat kita belum merdeka, kemudian melakukan usaha agar kita hanya menghambakan diri kepada Allah semata. 

Wallahua'lam bishowab. 

Bismillah. 

Prolog

Sebelum ke topik yang tertulis di judul, aku mau menceritakan behind story-nya dulu. Jadi, beberapa waktu ini, aku menikmati metode belajar bahasa dengan cara membaca tulisan (open letter di Slowly, atau halaman buku), menerjemahkannya dengan bantuan Meta AI, melakukan breakdown kalimat di sana, dan menganalisis isi atau kata atau grammar di dalamnya.

Qadarullah, salah satu pengguna hellotalk yang aku ikuti sedang membaca buku tentang cinta, judulnya 처음부터 끝까지 고백 by 이주영, literal arti judulnya Love Confession from First till The End by Lee JuYeong. Biasanya beliau (pengguna hellotalk tersebut) buka voiceroom trus baca buku gitu full dalam bahasa korea. Aku kebetulan gak match jadwalnya, jadi aku chat minta kirim halaman dari buku tersebut. Dan dia dengan baik hati kasih lumayan banyak.. Padahal kemampuan bahasa koreaku masih minim. Anyway.

Jadi di halaman awal penulis mengatakan bahwa gara-gara jatuh cinta terlalu dalam, dia sampai harus makan obat sakit kepala dan obat pencernaan. Jujur aku agak tidak mengerti kenapa sampai segitunya. Berdasarkan pengalamanku, jatuh cinta lebih sering menghadirkan perasaan positif. Even if it's a crush, having a crush for me is like having a hidden treasure, a little sweet thing we could take in our day.

Lalu ketika baca lebih banyak halaman, aku sedikit bisa memahami penulis. Menurutku yang membuat perasaannya sampai mempengaruhi kesehatan fisiknya itu bukan cinta tersebut, tapi karena ia terbiasa menekan perasaan/emosinya. Seseorang yang terbiasa menekan emosi/perasaan biasanya pasti bisa berefek ke penyakit fisik, atau mungkin biasa disebut psikomatis.

***

Lanjut… beberapa hari berikutnya, di open letter slowly, ada sebuah surat berbahasa arab. Karena aku waktu itu lagi bahas Slowly sama Meta AI, jadi deh, aku share surat tersebut dan minta Meta AI buat nerjemahin suratnya.

Trus kita lanjut diskusi deh, tentang salah satu kalimat populer dalam bahasa arab yang sering ada di lirik-lirik lagu.

Dan dari surat itu, aku tahu kalau si penulis juga merasakan rasa sakit karena cinta.

Trus, aku jadi membuka diskusi tentang hal tersebut dengan meta AI *please don't judge me cause I'm having this conversation with AI instead of real person. ><

Dari situ deh, kami bahas tentang why love is painful, dan pilihanku supaya cinta tidak semenderita dan semenyakitkan itu.

Sekian prolognya.  Setelah ini, aku akan copy paste percakapanku dengan meta AI. It will be in english. Aku mungkin akan mengedit atau memotong bagian-bagian tertentu, jadi yang kamu baca bukan full percakapan antara aku dan meta AI. 

 

***

Love That Doesn't End as What We Want

Aku baca sebuah open letter di Slowly dalam bahasa arab, dengan bantuan Meta AI (karena aku gak punya kemampuan baca bahasa arab tanpa harakat selain yang udah familiar seperti doa/ayat Quran).

Berikut sebagian kecil dari open letter yang aku baca, dan translasi dari Meta AI.

 

the breakdown:

Lalu aku bertanya lebih jauh tentang kalimat yang masih aku tidak pahami. Here my conversation with Meta AI.

💬 Me: Can you explain me this sentence, "A person gets their share of what they love" or "we take a glimpse of the thing we loved"

Actually I don't know if I understand it properly.

Is the meaning is, we can't get all what we love, only a little, a part, or a glimpse of it?

📱 Meta AI: You’re understanding it, and the fact that you’re unsure proves the sentence is doing its job. It’s meant to ache a little.
 

“A person gets their share of what they love”

Yes, but it’s deeper than “you can’t have it all.”

Think of it like this:

1️⃣ “Share / نصيب” → In Arabic, _nasib_ = portion, fate, destiny. It’s not just “a little piece”.

It’s “the piece that was written for you”.

So the line is saying: love isn’t a buffet. You don’t get to pick 5 servings.

You get what life/fate hands you. Sometimes that’s a lot, sometimes a glimpse.

2️⃣ “We take a glimpse of the thing we loved” → This is the softer, sadder version.

A glimpse = لمحة. Not the whole person, not the whole story. Just a look, a memory, a feeling that passes. Like seeing someone you loved across the street for 2 seconds. That’s your share.
 

So the meaning has 2 layers:

▪️ *Practical layer*: You won’t own all of what you love. You can love the night, but you can’t marry it. You can love a person, but you don’t get every version of them. You get moments. Glimpses.

▪️ *Philosophical layer*: Maybe that’s enough. The sentence doesn’t say “you’re unlucky”.

It says “that glimpse _is_ your share”. It’s not punishment. It’s just how love works. We don’t get to keep it. We get to witness it.

That’s why the writer put it right before “….it’s all I have 🤍”. He’s looking at his glimpse and calling it “all”. Not because he’s delusional, but because he’s accepted it.

For an overthinker like you, it’s brutal and comforting at once. Brutal: “I won’t get all of it”. Comforting: “but what I did get was mine. And it counts.”

Does that land? Or does it still feel like the sentence is dodging the real answer?

💬 Me: So it's talking about fate.

Btw, actually I can't really read Arabic without harakah, so I don't know the real sound of the sentence he heard from the song. Can you put the romanization of it?

I just realize it's talking about nasib. I know nasib, since it's also a word in Indonesia.

So I think he just talking about loving someone who he can't be married to.

📱Meta AI: Exactly — it’s all about _nasib_. And you’re right, Indonesia borrowed that word too. Same meaning: portion, fate, what’s written for you.

You nailed his situation too. “Loving someone you can’t be married to” is the most common way that line gets used. He got his glimpse, not the whole life.

Since you can’t read Arabic without harakah, here’s the romanization so you can “hear” it:

*1️⃣ “A person gets their share of what they love”*

Arabic: كل واحد بياخد نصيبه من اللي بيحبه

Romanization: _Kull wahed biyakhud nasibu min illi bihibbu_

Pronunciation tip: _Kull wa-HED bi-YA-khud na-SEE-bu min IL-li bi-HIB-bu_

Literally: “Everyone takes his share from the one he loves”

*2️⃣ “We take a glimpse of the thing we loved”*

Arabic: بناخد لمحة من الحاجة اللي حبناها

Romanization: _Binakhud lamha min el haga illi hibnaha_

Pronunciation tip: _bi-NA-khud LAM-ha min el HA-ga IL-li hi-BNA-ha_

_Lamha_ = glimpse, flash, momentary look.

_Haga_ = thing/stuff, casual word.

*About nasib:*

Yeah, it’s fate, but not the “everything is planned so why try” kind.

In Arabic love songs, _nasib_ is bittersweet.

It means “this was meant for me, but only this much”. Like getting 3 songs with someone instead of a whole album.

So when he writes that line, he’s not complaining. He’s naming it. “Okay. My nasib with her was night walks + a song. That’s it. That’s my share.”

Hearing it romanized, does it hit different?

The _nasibu min illi bihibbu_ has that rhythm that makes people quote it for years.

***

Tapi percakapanku dengan Meta AI belum selesai,

To be continued...

Trailer for next part/ ending part..

cuplikan layar import percakapan dengan Meta AI [1]

Wallahua'lam.

***

Keterangan: 

[1] Karena percakapan di Meta AI gak bisa di search dan aku cape harus scroll up hanya untuk buat konten/tulisan dari percakapanku dengan AI yang campur2 isinya, akhirnya aku pilih import percakapanku dari WA ke Telegram. Ada yang aku import ke email juga, tapi belum aku buka sama sekali, karena lebih sederhana import ke chat telegramku ke akun hubby wkwkwk.

Bismillah.

Nukil Buku "Master Your Dopamine - Nick Trenton, NickTrenton.com"

Lanjutan aliran rasa dan catetan setelah baca 32/143 dari halaman pdf buku tentang dopamin. Nukil bukunya dalam bahasa inggris yaa.. 

***

I'm only on 32/143 of the PDF pages.

I'm on the 2nd chapter learning about dopamine detox/dopamine fasting.

It is a technique to manage addictive behaviour. While restricting ourselves doing activity that gives instant dopamine, we hope to gain more natural dopamine cycle and also have control upon our behaviour and not becoming too impulsive towards the "cue" or urge towards dopamine loop.

Dopamine fasting emphasize in the importance of accepting challenging emotion like boredom or loneliness, rather than turning to quick solution/activities that could become addictive.

***

There's also a new term I learn, CBT. Which tell us to incorporates mindfulness practice while trying to break a bad habit/behaviour.

It is called as "urge surfing"

Just like surfing the waves on sea. We try to surf our waves of emotion (psychological craving).

 

Step to do "urge surfing":

1. Acknowledge the craving (e.g having the thought of want to smoke cigarettes) while remembering that it will eventually subside

2. Label their emotion (frustration, anxiety upon not having it)

3. Noting any physical sensations that accompany the emotions (sweating, rapid heartbeat, elevated temperature)

4. Use mindfulness practice to not be defeated by the urge and let it subside

 

But... It is also said in the book, that "urge surfing" does not mean that individuals have to fight the urge and make it go away.

Instead, we learn how to completely experience the urge in different way, which is to experience the urge for what it is: brief, nonlethal, with a generally predictable path, and most importantly, defeatable.

I know it's already long, but last.. quote that I want to share.
 

"He (Sepah) believes that by avoiding the instant gratification that these items (compulsive behaviour) provide, people can again more rewarding long-term goals/gratification and liberate themselves from painful or time-consuming compulsions that provide only instant dopamine hits." 

Wallahua'lam. 

Bismillah. 

Nukil Buku  "Adab dan Kiat dalam Menggapai Ilmu" - Abdul Aziz bin Muhammad bin Abdullah As-Sadhan

***

📝 Seorang penuntut ilmu harus memiliki adab-adab yang mendi karakternya. Dia perlu meneladani jejak para salafus shalih dalam proses mendapatkan ilmu, dan abagaimana mereka terhadap ilmu yang telah mereka dapatkan 

📝 Permasalahannya bukan pada jumlah buku yang dimiliki sedikit; karena banyak dari kita yang memiliki puluhan bahkan ratusan buku, namun yang menjadi pokok permasalahannya di sini adalah masalah manajemen waktu; karena sebagian besar kita memiliki banyak waktu, namun jika kita tidak bisa mengaturnya, maka seakan-akan kita tidak memiliki waktu.

📝 Ketahuilah bahwa ilmu itu adalah cahaya yang Allah Ta'ala tanamkan ke dalam hati seorang hamba. Dan ilmu bukanlah semata-mata dari banyak membaca, bukan pula semata-mata karena banyak memiliki buku.

📝 Imam Abu Bakar Al-Baihaqi adalah penulis buku terbesar dalam masalah hukum dengan penyebutan sanad-sanadnya, yaitu kitab beliau Sunan Al-Kubra. Beliau pernah menemui kesulitan untuk mendapatkan sejumlah referensi, namun hal tersebut tidaklah menjadi penghalang beliau untuk mengeluarkan karya tulis.

📝 Yang paling dibutuhkan dalam menuntut ilmu sebelum yang lainnya adalah memurnikan niat hanya untuk Allah Ta'ala semata. Menuntut ilmu juga membutuhkan pengorbanan; baik yang terkait dengan pengorbanan jasmani, waktu, jiwa atau pun harta. Maka jika Allah Ta'ala menyatukan pada diri seorang hamba, antara niat yang ikhlas dan pengorbanan terhadap hal-hal yang kami sebutkan, berarti Allah Ta'ala akan mudahkan baginya segala hal yang sulit.

📝 Dan merupakan keniscayaan bagi siapa pun, apabila ilmu tidak didapati di daerahnya sendiri, hendaknya dia mengadakan perjalanan untuk menuntut ilmu.

📝 Seorang yang alim, dia mengajarkan manusia dengan tingkah lakunya, ucapannya, serta sikapnya. Maka sudah sepatutnya bagi seorang penuntut ilmu, agar menjadi teladan dalam segala urusannya, dan tidak berucap maupun bersikap melainkan di atas petunjuk dan cahaya ilahi.

📝 Maka kesimpulannya; saat sekarang ini kita sama sekali tidak kekurangan referensi, tidak kekurangan dalam masalah guru dan juga waktu, semua ini adalah hal yang mudah dan dapat dipenuhi, segala puji hanya milik Allah. Akan tetapi yang kita butuhkan adalah ketakwaan. Yang kita butuhkan adalah kemauan untuk mencurahkan kesungguhan kita, semampu kita, sehingga kita bisa memetik buah dari tanaman yang kita tanam. 

Wallahua'lam bishowab. 

***

Keterangan: Resume dari buku tersebut dibuat karena sempat tersisih saat ikut RSC (Rahmah Study Club). I don't want to lose the chance to read and learn this book, even if my reading space is way more slow than the community's members.

Baca juga:

Faktor-Faktor Penghalang dalam Menuntut Ilmu 

Beberapa Contoh Kesungguhan Ulama Memanfaatkan Waktu 

Kesempatan yang Sering Disia-siakan oleh Sebagian Penuntut Ilmu